Learning to Leap

Boy, oh boy, has it ever been an eventful dog week around here. Tonight, we will discuss the dramatic conclusion to the emotional drama revolving around a now familiar topic, Hank Webber., Jr. If you need to be caught up or reminded of what's been going on, check out the prior events: (part 2) http://webberstories.blogspot.com/2012/03/these-are-few-of-my-not-favorite-things.html ( part 1) http://webberstories.blogspot.com/2012/02/these-are-two-of-my-not-favorite-things.html Today, I got serious about this dog, particularly in regard to the fate of his soul. I am frankly concerned about his eternal destination based on his behavior. Hank went to church with us. Okay, okay, it was not actually my idea to bring the dog to church, though I cannot deny he could certainly use a come to Jesus meeting. He was actually part of an object lesson my husband was teaching to a group of first and second graders. The basic gist was that God loves us and takes care of us as His children....

Okay, we will pick up where we left off discussing a few of my NOT favorite things. I don't like to dwell on the negative like this, but sometimes my Julie Andrews persona just gets fed up, and if I have to sing about kittens and rainbows one more second I might combust. So bear with me, readers, for joy comes in the morning. If you missed it, catch yourself up so you can grasp the full impact of the following turn of events. http://webberstories.blogspot.com/2012/02/these-are-two-of-my-not-favorite-things.html About an hour after the whole vomit covered child and vacuuming out of the bathtub, I was still buried in laundry which needed immediate attention. This leads me to my regular conversation with myself that all mothers really should have commercial sized washers and dryers. The sheer volume of the laundry we must do each week necessitates it, and that's when all your kids are healthy. You throw a sick one in the mix and you may as well kiss your "free" time...

We all know as mothers we are required to step up to the plate sometimes. There are lots of moments throughout the child raising years when we just have to do gross things, things we never in a million years as teenagers thought we'd be willing to do. If you're a mama, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Things that are just too nasty to mention. I really don't enjoy dwelling on some of my more, well, revolting tasks as a mother of young kids. I have two things that just really, really gross me out. Forgive me, but I'll have to mention them here or else this blog will be kind of missing the point. But you do need to know that all pictures in this blog are not from the actual event described. I simply could not and was not willing to subject my readers to the horrors I witnessed. You'll see why. The first thing I really, really hate is vomit. Just looking at that word in print bothers me. I've gotten better, really, I have, but the presence and ...

The Management in my home is getting fed up. New policies are being instated and enforced with diligence. New policy #1 (and being illiterate does not exempt residents from responsibility) All clothes found in the laundry room or hamper which are not actually dirty shall incur a fine of 25 cents per item. Certain young residents around here are slightly obsessed with changing clothes at amazing rates of speed. Clothing must be worn a minimum of half a day in order to be considered for laundering. Management has deemed it appropriate to charge a nominal fee for extra needless laundry. This seems fair. After all, the money will likely go to purchase additional detergent, dryer sheets, and Tylenol for my aching back. We are prepared for the reality that most of our residents will be broke within two days, but don't worry, rent is cheap around here. New Policy #2 "No food allowed past this point." This includes, but is not limited to, goldfish crackers, gummy treats, l...

Do you remember that one crazy, reckless thing you did as a kid? That thing you knew you definitely should not do, but you were feeling daring and decided to throw caution to the wind? That 'burn the ships' mentality that you were going to do it and to heck with the consequences? Remember that feeling? I would like to introduce you to two little people in my home who most certainly experienced the euphoria of deliberate naughtiness this evening. I don't know what came over them. It was like their Thelma and Louise moment. And boy, did they ever live it out to the fullest. It went down like this: 7pm. Bathtime. A tiny revolt concerning wanting to take a shower instead of a bath, but I quickly squashed the uprising and all was well. I got both of them in the tub, where they were all smiles and sweetness, and left the bathroom for just a moment. During that "mere moment", my children went a little bit temporarily insane. Really. If I could have access to t...

We are all greatly anticipating warmer temperatures and will happily welcome spring. Why? Oh, lots of reasons. We can get out and enjoy the sunshine, I can set the kids loose to ride bikes and scooters and big wheels in the cul-de-sac and burn off excess energy, and we can make sidewalk chalk masterpieces on the driveway and in the street. We love warm weather. But this year there is another reason I am counting the days to warmer weather. It has to do with a certain dog: Now, not to name names, but there is a certain pet in this home who has been somewhat of a problem lately. I attribute it to the fact that he hates me, but some have urged me to give him the benefit of the doubt since he is but a solitary year old and still displaying definite puppy behavior. Nevertheless, as soon as I don't have to feel bad about this certain canine getting frost bite or my kids discovering him as a spaniel popsicle, out he's going. Why, you ask, am I being so tough on such a cute little...

Things are changing in my home. It was inevitable, I suppose, as my children grew older. Yes, I knew it was coming, but I was not fully prepared for the severity and quick onset of a little mindset I like to call, "the Mr. Potter". You remember this character. He was the villain in the classic movie, "It's a Wonderful Life" with Jimmy Stewart. Fantastic movie. Potter is a miserable old man totally obsessed with the accumulation of money. He's willing to do just about anything to acquire more, including lie, steal, and cheat. It's not a pretty sight. Two of my three children still have virtually no understanding of the value of money. They couldn't tell the difference between a $1 bill and a $100 bill and would quickly hand over either one for a stick of gum. This can be quite handy when the tooth fairy visits and they are ecstatic when she leaves them a quarter. As for the third child? Meet Mr. Potter in the form of an 8-year-old girl. Her ...