Showing posts from April, 2016

I'm Not Jealous Enough


Some days I feel the familiar sting more than others. But there's been progress. It's not debilitating like it used to be. It doesn't stop me in my tracks anymore or take my breath away like it did for so very long. It doesn't happen every day, and for that I'm grateful. Sometimes it's a good long while in between before the sting returns and I realize I've enjoyed a long run without it. 
But some days, the sting rears its ugly head and flares up in my heart again with no warning, no red flags, nothing to alert me that it's coming. And when it finds me, I've learned to respond differently than I once did. I've learned on those days to lean INTO it rather than try to resist it. I've learned to feel it fully instead of trying to rush past by finding ways to distract myself. 
But mostly, I've learned that this sting is not a bad thing. Now don't get me wrong, I sure don't enjoy it. None of us do. But it's okay. Because …