I’m raising a criminal. Really. My two-year-old has a problem.
We live on a nice little cul-de-sac. There are just seven other houses grouped with ours and we love the freedom a quiet cul-de-sac grants us. It’s kind of cozy and quaint. We’re like a family and the kids enjoy great freedom to run around and play.
This freedom has proved too much for Leighanne. She has recently begun doing this:
It’s becoming a problem. She absolutely delights in darting from mailbox to mailbox. She happily opens lids, examines letters, sometimes licks letters, plays with mailbox flags, and has even been caught switching letters from one box to the next. It’s great fun to her.
I witnessed this criminal behavior going on just yesterday afternoon. I looked up to the sound of Lauren yelling at the top of her lungs.
“Leighanne! Stop opening mailboxes! You’ll have to go to juvey!”
This somewhat baffles me. I have no idea where my child learned about juvenile detention. Have I threatened it during more intense parenting moments? I don’t recall using that term. Even I draw the line at scary threats. Nonetheless, Lauren has begun regularly pointing out to all of us that her baby sister is almost certain to serve time with other law breaking youths such as herself.
I’ve noticed as well that they have been playing “jail” quite a bit lately. Yesterday they even got out all my spare keys (the ones I have no idea what they go to but don’t want to throw away) and pretended locking each other in their “cells”.
I am getting a bit nervous about their infatuation with criminal life.
If you discover some bills are overdue or you’re missing important invitations, look no further. The criminal mastermind of mailboxes dwells in my home.